All Aboard The Playbus *ding ding*

UK residents born in the 80s/90s may remember a lovely children's programme called Playdays and all the fun they had on the Playbus, with all the different stops and it was all so nice and colourful and........

Why the feck can't real buses and bus stops be like that? Instead you get drunken weirdos slogging their way through litre plastic bottles of White Ice cheapo cider - The 21st Century White Lightning? - at 2.45 in the afternoon, whilst screaming at the traffic and then muttering randomness under their breath. The same weirdo was also staring at young girls, creeping them out, and talking utter nonsense at whoever he decided to direct it at. He also threw his remaining swigs of cider, and bottle over the bus stop, proving he's also a knob who litters.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to avoid eye contact with the crazy drunk man, by watching a pigeon try to eat a Quaver.* But could it break that quaver into smaller pieces? Could it balls. You couldn't fault the commitment to his cause. His poor head was going haywire bashing that Quaver against the ground. But this one was invincible. Not even a crumb flicked off.

*For those of you not familiar with a Quaver, it is a cheesy crisp now made by Walkers, but they used to be made by Smiths, and they sort of curl round, and were part of classic party food for Kids parties in the 80s/90s. Not sure about after that, but I hope, along with Skips, they still are going strong.

At the same time, the wind is cranking up and sending the poor bird in circles chasing after the damn thing. But persevere it does. After chasing a crumb of unknown origin, he's back pursuing his prey with a steely eyed determination. And this time he drops it off the kerb into the road, and just keeps bashing it against the asphalt, over and over, until he is victorious.

Mr Pigeon and his victory crumb. 

This was about the time our drunken lunatic hurled his back wash remains of White Ice Cider over the bus stop, and I lost track of Mr Pigeon after that.

So really Playdays, you had it easy. No traffic. No waiting for ten minutes just to turn the corner from Midland Road onto Euston Road. No stopping part way through the journey, to change drivers. No diversions. No random terminations. No annoying stop closures. I mean, could you imagine getting to the Tent stop and it being closed? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0pXnprQvSA

I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed buses.

Rants