Unlimited Champagne, Partying With The Mayoress And The Uselessness Of The 214.

Well, what a fantastic couple of weeks writing. The blogs have been going down a storm; I had an article published online and the chapters that were eluding me have been well and truly kicked in the face and battered into submission.  

You will not defeat me you fookin' chapters from hell. Yes, I know I wrote them but it doesn't make them any less hellish. But I think now that chapter 12 has been reshaped and the chapters preceding and following it are amended in order to flow successfully, I think the rest of the edit will come much quicker.

My dream is to have it all edited again (for the 12th time) before we go on holiday next Friday. Pipe dream?
Maybe so. But I don't usually have deadlines, so maybe this will give me the push I need. *Giddy at the prospect*

And so to a week of actual bizarreness. After last week's shenanigans at Farmaggedon: (thanks to everyone who read the blog, making it one of my top 5 best viewed blogs. I was thrilled with this but also thrilled to acknowledge such a great, Northern attraction.) This week included an Unlimited Champagne Afternoon Tea; hanging out with the Mayoress of Camden; discovering an awesome band from Leigh, Lancashire and the uselessness of the 214 bus.

I will begin with the wonder of Afternoon Tea, especially when Unlimited Champagne is put in front of it. Another birthday gift from another amazing friend - I'm really drawing out this thirty melarchy - and what a great afternoon to do it.

A grey miserable day, interspersed with drizzle, then harder rain and unfortunately a mega traffic jam that almost made me late. But I arrived in my vans and nice dress, quickly changing into my Irregular Choice Panda/Polka dot heels as I entered the ridiculously posh: Intercontinental, Westminster. Can you say, oo-la-la.

Yes I was worried there would be instant lock out as soon as they heard my accent, but come on I'd poshed up for this. No jeans, but an actual dress and tights and heels. Now being a self-confessed weirdo and non caffeine drinker, I have never been for an Afternoon Tea for obvious reasons - I don't drink tea. But! L my remarkable friend found the joy of all joys which consisted of unlimited champagne.

Oh my. It's lovely. I had a whole couch to myself and they were true to their word on the constant refilling of the champagne. We were brought finger sandwiches with various rather luxuriant fillings; multitudes of tiny cakes and desserts; and of course plain and fruit scones with clotted cream (fuck yeah!) and jam.

We had a very attentive waiter who brought us additional sandwiches as well as more champagne. You gotta love the bubbles. And then I even tried an earl grey tea with lemon. Argh! Does that mean I'm a grown up now? No? Oh good. That would have been terrible.

Just to add to the incredibleness there was a harpist playing and singing in the lobby. Absolutely beautiful voice and a dark blue harp. *Jealous* And the toilets were hilarious. Every time I went in - which I realise makes me sound like I have bladder issues -  there were maids refilling the towels, yes individual towels to dry your hands on. And we met an equally giddy/champagne drunk who was also enjoying the afternoon tea extravaganza.

Honestly, you should do it. It's fun to see how the posh people live and the food is incredible and the champagne flows really well and I can't thank L enough. Truly fantastic day and highly recommended.

Moving on to Sunday night and partying with the Mayoress of Camden. Now with Camden being a super cool place, we of course have a super cool Mayor who in turn chose a freakin' awesome Mayoress: Marcella Puppini, who amongst her many talents is the founding member of The Puppini Sisters. (If you don't know who they are then check them out because they are incredible. We're talking shit hot harmonies, amazing costumes, wonderfully talented musicians and three beautiful ladies bringing the 30's and 40's to your ears.) https://www.facebook.com/puppinisisters

And so Proud Gallery at Camden Market is the venue for Marcella's latest endeavour: The Mayoress Presents. It's a showcase for up and coming talent in the music world, as well as DJ's and dancing troupes and the first one was Sunday. She also has a radio show (which incidentally A is being interviewed on as I blog) and a TV show on YouTube.

Weirdly A was already in contact with her through work things and so we were on the guest list. *Wearing small chufty badge* And the night didn't disappoint. Beginning with a fabulously fun, wonderfully melodious pop/Indie band from Leigh, Lancashire named: The Lottery Winners, the night held all sorts of unexpected randomness. https://www.facebook.com/thelotterywinners

The Lottery Winners with all their northern wit and strong Lancashire accents proved not only great musicians with fun songs and catchy hooks, but bloody hilarious to boot. Front man Thomas (singer and guitarist) seemed unable to stop talking but that just added to the whole act. And for me, a Lassie from Lancashire, it was beltin' to hear some familiar expressions.

Rob (guitar and backing vocals) and Katie (Bass guitar and backing vocals) proved there were three ridiculously competent singers in the group with beautiful harmonies adding greatly to their sound. Drummer Joe was tight and talented and lots of other thing beginning with T. I'm so sorry Joe, I don't know what to write about drummers but you were excellent! They enjoyed every moment of the gig, despite their rather lengthy trip down and you could tell they were thrilled to be playing in the capital. 

They describe themselves as 'smiley pop music, ' which is true but also in that it makes you smile too. The banter and crowd pleasing sing-alongs really bring the audience in and who can resist that Lancashire charm?

When I screamed at the announcement they were from Salford - the only one in the audience of course - I got some strange looks, but when I screamed again at them being from Leigh, I felt I had to explain myself.

"I'm from Wigan." I yelled. Luckily they knew where it was because no one else in the room did.

I strongly urge you to check them out. Great, great fun. A really tight band and really shit hot musicians. Those voices, especially in their song, Emerald City, were mesmerising. And if they come to your local area, go and support them, it would be impossible not to enjoy yourself. https://twitter.com/TheLotWins

We were also treated to a 60's dance troupe called The Actionettes. http://www.actionettes.com/ They were really fun, all in colourful shift dresses with matching tights. Each had a different colour on giving a rainbow effect and they were having such a lovely time, as were we, watching them. A great bunch and mix of ladies of all ages, shapes and sizes just really enjoying themselves. Fabulous to watch and I imagine fabulous to partake. I could definitely get on board with that. And check out their website to see what else they've been up to.

The final act was not my cup of tea musically but was fantastic in so many ways: Viktoria Modesta. Not only was Adamski DJing for her but she was a model, a bionic woman, had a great singing voice and a cool rapper friend who joined her for one track. Check out her facebook site especially if you're into 3 step and pretty ladies.  https://www.facebook.com/ViktoriaModesta

It was a bizarre mix of acts but in a way that just sums Camden up in one foul swoop. Anything goes. No limitations. No judgement. No prejudice. And it was great to be a part of it. The Mayoress Presents nights at Proud are a monthly event, the next one on Sunday November 17th. Check out the website, get a ticket and come and schmooze with the coolest Mayoress ever! Oh and beware of the hideously drunk girl in the pink jumper who wouldn't leave us alone. I'm not sure if she'll be there but watch out for her anyway. Harmless and quite fun but rat arsed and not always able to remain standing. https://www.facebook.com/mayoresspresents

Okay this is becoming a waffle not a rant. Sorry. I've used all my brevity cells on the edits and my article that was published yesterday. Singing your way to Speech and Confidence is based on my Early Years Music Classes. Just had to mention it. *Slightly giddy*  Might as well link it here too, why not? http://www.educationforeverybody.co.uk/singing-your-way-to-speech-and-confidence/
It's for a great online magazine called Education for Everyone, mainly focusing on SEN matters and inclusion within schools and things but if you have kids or know any children, you may be interested.

So the final thing really is a rant! 214 bus. Fuck You!

I was on you for an hour and 5 minutes today for a journey that TFL says lasts for 36 minutes. Now there's accounting for delays and then there's just doubling the fucking journey time. Honestly, I'm that wound up I'm close to using an acronym. No I won't do it. No. I'll just keep f'in' and Geoffin' instead.

I wouldn't mind if I was just late for a friend or a meeting or something. Well I would because I hate being late but that is acceptable and I would text to say I'm late and it would all be fine. But when you're picking up a child from school and you realise you're likely to be 15 minutes late, this is now taking the ultimate piss.

Luckily A was at home and he found me the number of the school. (I know I should have already had it saved in my phone but we're ranting about the bus here, not my lack of preparation.) So I called and they said it was fine, but then the bus was diverted and I don't have a smart phone and I also didn't have my AtoZ, so I had no idea where I was. Fucking brilliant.

Anyhoo, I knew at some point we would have to emerge at Old Street and when we did I pegged it, with bags falling off my shoulders and my legs saying, "Erm what is this fast movement you expect me to do? I'm tired. I've been sat on a bus for 65 minutes."

65 minutes. Well I can tell you one thing. Next time I'll be taking the tube and I'll be arriving 20 minutes early and going into Oliver Bonas and drooling over all the things I can't afford. I will not be running through the streets in my Bat t-shirt wheezing on people.

214 fuck you! Rant over now and so is the blog.

Thank you for reading and seriously, check out the band and the Mayor Presents thing and drink champagne if you can, preferably unlimited, with a good friend.

Rants